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The CN Tower is lit up bright red and green, the streets of Toronto are covered in sparkling lights, and that fluffy stuff is finally starting to fall from the sky.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year…right?
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Well, despite the excessive amount of holiday cheer, you’re also gearing up for spending a few days back home with family… and you know the kind of stress that can bring. Don’t get us wrong – we love spending time with family and friends over the holidays. But sometimes, the holidays make for the most awkward time of the year … for singles, anyway.
Between the massive helpings of mashed potatoes, catching up with cousins, and those hilarious, eggnog and rum infused conversations with Aunt Carol – your personal life will inevitably be up for discussion.
You know what comes next: the dreaded, “So, are you seeing anyone special?” question that plagues millennials.
Miranda Hobbes from Sex and the City hit the nail on the head with this one back in 2003 with the: “No, but I’m seeing a lot of un-special people,” rebuttal.
If you are seeing someone, that’s great for you! But you shouldn’t even be reading this article. Go away. Be in love. Shut up about it.
For the rest of us (if you’re a part of the whopping 64% millennials who are about to enter the holiday season without a significant other by their side), you’ve got to be prepared for the inevitable, “Why are you still single?” question.
Because it’s coming.
And to help you out, we took to King West (and social media) to find out millennials’ best rebuttals to every relative’s favourite question. Use these over the holidays and with any luck you can shut Aunt Carol up until next year.
THE BRUTALLY HONEST:
“I’m single because a margarita always hits the spot and a boyfriend doesn’t.” – Carissa, 26
“No, I’m already in a committed relationship with chocolate and wine.” – Ali, 24
“I’m super picky and not desperate to jump into anything.” – Hayden, 22
“My sex life is too busy for this so-called monogamy thing…” – Carrie, 27
“They just don’t make them like they used to…” – Leah, 24
THE HEARTFELT:
“I say I haven’t met the right one yet. It’s cliché but it’s true… Can you link to my Tinder profile in this article?” – Ryan, 22
“I tell them that my friends make me happier than any guy ever could.” – Loretta, 22
“I still believe that love is something worth waiting for.” – Melissa, 28
“I just tell them I love myself more than anyone else has. And it’s true.” – Jessica, 23
THE JUST PLAIN SAD:
“My family doesn’t even ask anymore. Apparently I’m a lost cause.” – Chaney, 22
“I always seem to go home with a burrito at the end of the night instead of a person…” – Clark, 24
“I just tell them if I had a girlfriend then I wouldn’t have time to go to the gym. But we all know that’s a lie.” –Stefano, 23
“Mom, Dad, I’d like you to meet Ben & Jerry.” – Rebecka, 22
WAIT, WHAT?
“I’m still holding out for Drake.” – Katrina, 24
“I’m actually not up for parole until 2017…” – Lea, 25
“I already have two illegitimate kids and I think that’s enough.” – Mike, 25
Have a comeback to add to the list? Let us know on our Facebook page, winner gets to stay single!
*Names have been changed
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