As the holidays approach, we’re reminded of the sound of sleigh bells, smiles on children’s faces, and the increased amount of time we’ll soon be spending in taxis. And while we’d like to post a piece on all things joyful and festive, we thought it was a heck of a lot more fun to make a list (and check it twice) of all the things cabbies do that really grind our gears. We know not every taxi driver practices any or all of these behaviours, but one bad apple spoils the bunch and all that…
The following are just a few of the habits we wish drivers everywhere would quit. Call it our Christmas wish or their New Year’s resolution – either way, can’t we all just get along this holiday season?
Why are the windows down in winter with the heat blasting? Why is the only option a sauna or an icebox? The first production of automatic climate control was introduced in 1964. How have you not figured this out in the past 50 years!?
The ‘Where Are You Going’?
Asking this question before we’re inside the cab and then denying us entry when you don’t like said answer makes us angry. Your entire job is to take us where we’re going – save ‘the moon’, it shouldn’t really matter where, should it?
The ‘Cash or Credit‘
We’re sorry we don’t have cash on us. Trust us, we’d like to have bills falling out of our wallets at all times, but it’s just not always the way it is. How, in 2013, are you still rejecting the plastic that the rest of the world accepts?
We’ve seen cabs before. We know what they look like and what they do. Slowing down and honking at us will not suddenly inspire us to jump in. Your horn is not a magic siren calling out to us with enchanting lyrical sublimity in order to lure us toward you. It’s a loud, annoying, beep. Stop it.
The Driving Standard
We don’t know why you never let anyone in but always expect to be let in. We don’t know why it’s so important that you get ahead of every car on the road at all times. We get that this is your job – but shouldn’t that make you a better driver?
We don’t know who you’re constantly talking to and sometimes we think it’s us – which is always awkward. Can’t we just have a nice, quiet ride once in a while? Whatever happened to the radio? Or, you know, that whole thing where we both just ignore each other in silence until you drop us off?
Look, just because we’re drunk doesn’t mean we don’t know where we live. We’ve been there a lot. We’ve come at it from several different angles and we’re usually pretty aware when you’re using a different (see: longer) one. Don’t do that.
Despite what you may think, hazards don’t give you the right to do whatever you want. And when you stop in the middle of a busy street and cars are honking and people are shouting, we’re the ones who have to climb out and look like the jackass. Let’s end this four-way anarchy while we still can.
Let’s just think of it like a massage, okay? If we don’t engage you in a conversation, please don’t engage us. Sometimes the short journey we take with you is our only time to relax all day. In this case, a happy ending is when you’ve left us alone the whole ride.
Cover Image from: Tumblr