You don’t drink during the week… that’s the time for work, the gym, and sleep.
Instead, you save up all your money and energy for those two (sometimes four) glorious days known as The Weekend.
That oasis of pure binge.
And while it’s definitely not the healthiest lifestyle, it is the one you’re living right now. Here are 17 signs that you’re a Weekend Warrior.
1. Thursdays are like ‘Y’ is to vowels
Sometimes they’re part of the weekend and sometimes they’re not. It’s up to you, really.
2. Friday is never a full day
Cocktail hour starts at noon.
3. You see more nights than days
On the weekends, you’re more likely to see the sunrise than the sunset – and not ‘cause you’re getting up early…
4. Your barista knows you
Not by name, but by your Monday morning triple-espresso order. And it’s waiting for you when you walk in.
5. Brunch is the only meal you eat
Sure, there are random slices of pizza here and there, but this is the only one you actually sit down for.
6. You don’t believe in hair of the dog
‘Cause that would imply you’ve stopped drinking at some point.
7. Come Monday, you have enough empties to pay for your lunch
And you view this as a reward.
8. Everyone you work with thinks you’re really responsible
Your friends, on the other hand, have seen the dark side.
9. At least once a weekend you don’t wake up in your own bed
Whether it’s the couch, the floor, or someone else’s sheets, you just didn’t quite make it into your own.
10. You are in a photo on more than one club or bar’s website
And you can’t understand why this still doesn’t allow you to skip their lines.
11. Pre-drinking
This isn’t a real thing to you – it’s just drinking. All. The. Time.
12. You don’t smoke
Well, not your own cigarettes anyway – other people’s are fine.
13. Advil/Tylenol/Gatorade
These are purchased at Costco.
14. Credit card statements
They can tell a more accurate story of what you got up to over the last few days than you can.
15. You’re familiar with the two-day hangover
And depending on the weekend, it can sometimes last until Tuesday night.
16. Sunday Funday
You know you’re a proper WW when you view Sunday afternoon as another ‘night’ of the weekend. As long as you’re in bed by 10pm, it’s all good.
17. You are drinking while either writing or reading this article.
Wait. Uh-oh.
#NOTABLE
Want more updates on the most Notable things happening so you know before your colleagues do? Get our exclusive newsletter here and follow us on Twitter for all the latest.