Looking for Love in the Wrong Places

We have heard countless young professionals in our city and others across the country fall almost jaded, disgruntled and negative in terms of their view on whether they were ever going to find someone to spend their lives with. Perhaps they are looking for love in all the wrong places, as they all seem to experience the same grievances. If you are looking, odds are that you aren’t going to find what you are looking for anyway as most meaningful situations happen naturally. Here are the places you may want to avoid if you are searching for anything of significance… 

The Bar
The majority of single young professionals of all social circles across the city usually venture out with the hope that they just might meet someone and will leave their eyes, minds and hearts open to this possibility. Especially on a Friday or Saturday night, a bar is far from an ideal place because usually alcohol clouds one’s judgment of character and you can’t hear what the other is saying anyway. From our personal experience, half of the people at the bars are actually night scene regulars with no intention of giving up their party boy or party girl lifestyle any time soon, and are looking for and expecting one thing only. 

Your Past
At a certain age, usually after watching your friends one by one jump on the marriage bandwagon, and after numerous attempts at love, some YPs question whether they made a mistake in severing a relationship from the past because they were in a constant search for the next best thing that never came. At times when prospects for love seem dim, it is easy to remember the good about a former relationship and temporarily forget about the constant bickering, different aspirations and the fact that the relationship had naturally run its course and ended for a reason.

The Gym
The gym represents a time of sanctuary in one’s day and perhaps the only time he or she has to focus entirely on her or himself. The last thing anyone wants while at the gym (and likely makeup-free and drenched in sweat) is to be hit on by a fellow gym member. We know many young professionals who have joined gyms for the sole purpose of meeting people but haven’t seen anything materialize to date. We will keep you posted.

At Work
As frowned upon as it is, it is easy to fall for someone who you work with. After all, you spend so much time with the other person and they are right there within arm’s reach, free from the effort and time spent online dating, navigating nightclubs and asking friends to set you up. Even if it is not frowned upon in your company, this should be approached with caution anyway because if the two of you did end up dating and things went sour, you would have to put on a happy face and face the co-worker every day. 

On Vacation
There is always an element of romance and adventure when meeting someone on vacation and the somewhat naïve hope that you have somehow met your soul mate. You may have even discussed how your lives could work together, how you’d maintain a long distance relationship or whose city you’ll end up living in. We have seen very few relationships that begin on vacation actually last. A vacation is no indication of how well the two of you would function in the real world. Not only are relationships that begin as long distance difficult to sustain, vacation brings out the best in people, free from the stresses of every day life.