How the Wine Drinker and Water Drinker Can Coexist

It seems that dating has gotten a little trickier with the increasingly popular sober challenges made by partied-out young professionals. Even though we can hide behind our screens and smartphones when it comes to dating, we may not be able to hide behind the booze like we could in the past. So, what do you do when the person you are dating doesn’t drink? It isn’t as daunting as it sounds, and we have been on both sides of this drinking/non-drinking dating game. We have dated someone who didn’t drink in the height of our mid-twenties party phase and dated someone who drank too much while we took a two-month break from alcohol a few years later. Trust us, it is easier than you think to be on both sides of it. You may not have to run for the hills when your dinner date politely declines the wine. Here are our tips to deal with someone who does not drink…

When they don’t drink 

Don’t overdo it on dinner dates
Whether it is the first date or your 100th, it doesn’t have to be tedious or uneventful because the other person isn’t drinking. And you shouldn’t feel awkward about consuming booze yourself. There is a fine line, however, between a few cocktails… and a few cocktails and a bottle of wine. Not only will it throw off your whole dynamic (no matter how cute and endearing you think you are being), your company will quickly start to nod off when you lose all concept of time and sight of the fact that you’re the only two left in the place. Save the hardcore, university-style drinking for the big nights out with the guys or girls (if you’re still doing that in the first place).

Don’t suggest a place that encourages reckless drinking
As seasoned partiers, we will be the first to admit that there are certain, rowdier venues that youneed to be drunk at to tolerate. The most annoying thing in the world is to be the sober one in a sea of drunken assholes who stumble around and bump into one another in an overcrowded, sweaty space while they spill their beers and rum and cokes all over one another. At this age, that is barely fun when you are two (or 10) sheets to the wind, let alone stone cold sober.

Find other things to do
There are a million things that you can do in cities across the country that do not revolve around alcohol consumption. Things like sporting events, live comedy, theatre and art exhibits are equally as entertaining dead sober as they are after a few cocktails. With the warmer weather (hopefully) around the corner, activities like tennis, golf, bike rides and hikes make other fun options. Or drive out of the city to explore the country and grab fresh ingredients from a farmers market for the amazing outdoor meal you’ll savour later on.

Remember the positive
At the end of the day, remember that, long-term especially, it’s better to be with someone who doesn’t drink at all than someone with a drinking problem. Trust us; the fights, hangovers, wasted nights and wasted dollars associated with dating someone with a booze issue leaves little to be desired. If nothing else, when your significant other doesn’t drink, it makes it all the more affordable when it is your turn to pick up the dinner tab.

When you don’t drink

Don’t judge
Odds are your date is not going to condemn you for your decision to take a break from the booze or to quit altogether. But just as accepting as he or she is of your beliefs, you need to be accepting of their lifestyle as long as it is not detrimental to their well-being (AKA they are being a train wreck). If they are not judgmental of your decision not to drink, then you should not push your lifestyle on them either. If it is a new relationship, don’t assume that you will be able to sway them the other way once you get comfortable. If it happens that your lifestyle rubs off on the other person, it should come as a pleasant surprise.

Stick to it
Whether you are doing a month-long sober challenge or have committed to a lifetime of sobriety, don’t break or make exceptions because the other person is drinking – no matter how into him or her you are. We admit we tend to party more or less depending on the habits of our significant other. Don’t get sucked into it.

Share your hobbies and passions
Odds are if you have been sober for some time, you’ve found other ways to spend your time –whether you’ve adopted a new passion or hobby or improved your skills at a sport. If you can, share these with your SO. He or she may, by default, end up spending more time on this new-found activity than hitting happy hour after work or joining the girls or guys on a party night out.

Think of the positive
Again, unless your SO parties like Lindsay Lohan when she was actually famous, let them enjoy that glass of wine or favourite cocktail all in good fun and to unwind from a long work day or week. And remember: all you are doing is positive for yourself. You can sip that soda or non-alcoholic beer knowing that will never embarrass yourself in a drunken stupor, will always remember how you got home, and probably argue with your SO less because of your booze-free commitment.

#LYNL | (Live Your Notable Life)

 

Cover image from: themadmod.blogspot.ca

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