We all (hopefully) have that intuitive voice within that conveniently informs us when it’s time to go home. If for whatever reason that little voice has packed it in for the night, here are 12 ways of knowing when you should probably leave the scene…
1. You don’t recognize anyone in the bar or at the event; the group of friends you came with have disappeared – some Houdini-style – and you realize that you’re all alone. Don’t be that girl or guy.
2. The bar/party/event is now only one-tenth full. There are noticeable patches in the crowd as people find their way out. If you’ve lost all of your friends, you will stand out even more once the crowd clears. Just because you still have half your drink left, it doesn’t mean you need to stay to finish it. In fact, it’s better if you don’t.
3. You have double (or, God forbid) triple texted (without reply) that person you told yourself you wouldn’t contact under any circumstance and under any alcoholic influence. And you already know you will regret it in the morning.
4. You have made at least one promise to a complete stranger that you know you won’t fulfill. This can be something social, as in “let’s do dinner next week,” or business-related, as in “we should totally collaborate.”
5. You are prepping for tomorrow or Monday’s big meeting in your mind, catching up on work emails while your friends chat over and around you, and/or are planning your outfit in your mind for your upcoming big presentation. If you have to bring the office to the bar, you should probably still be at your desk.
6. You keep thinking that cute girl or guy will finally break free of his or her company and come talk to you. If it’s been hours and you have yet to receive a glance back from him or her, you’re only making yourself less attractive by hanging around… plus you likely looked better earlier in the evening.
7. The bartender has your drink of choice ready for you before you even reach the bar.
8. You have given out someone else’s business card thinking it was your own.
9. You can’t feel your toes (but those shoes look damn hot!) or you’re covered in more alcohol than the bar is. Even worse: that alcohol could be sweat.
10. You can’t complete a sentence without yawning while dreaming of your sweatpants that await you at home, despite the pounding music and rowdy crowd.
11. You’ve told the same story so many times that even you’re sick of it – not to mention the poor people who have heard it more than once.
12. The lights are on, the music is off, and the lyrics of Closing Time are playing in your head.