How to Get Over Someone Who Just Isn’t Into You

It’s always a metaphorical slap in the face when someone you’re into isn’t feeling the same.

Not only is it a potential stab to the heart, it’s usually a blow to the ego as well (in fact, it’s sometimes hard to tell the difference).

There’s no way around it; it sucks. And yeah, it’s probably a good idea to embrace your emotions and to feel the pain for a bit to reassure yourself that you’re still human.

But just for a bit.

Then it’s time to get over it. Here’s how:

Watch The Notebook (or something like it).
Yes, we’re serious. Sure, it may make you feel worse to isolate yourself on your couch with an uber-romantic movie, but it could also do two positives for you: it could remind you of what a connection is supposed to feel like (and you’ll realize you didn’t have it with that person after all) and it could even get you all excited at the prospect of falling in love again. If you don’t have time for a full film, just watch this commercial.

Delete them from social media.
Scrolling through their social media profile isn’t going to do you any favours. In fact, spiralling down the social media rabbit hole in the wake of a breakup is one of the worst forms of torture you can put yourself through. The last thing you need is to be reminded of their charming smile or – even worse – for your investigative skills bring you to something or someone you don’t want to see.

Avoid awkward run-ins.
Don’t just avoid the other person on social media – dodge them in real life too. As strong as you think you are, you don’t know how difficult the sight of your ex will be to stomach until he or she is in front of your face. Even worse is if he or she is with someone else. Just one run-in has the ability to ruin a weekend. Avoid all situations with the potential of such encounters until your heart has healed.

Remember the last time the situation was reversed.
Before you even think about contacting the other person one last time (usually after some wine), take a moment to reflect upon the last time the roles were reversed and you were the heartbreaker. Once you’d made up your mind, you’d made up your mind, right? They have too. Trust me, if they wanted to get ahold of you, they know how to. Know when to give up.

Don’t let your ego take such a hit.
It’s so much easier in theory not to take break-ups personally. It’s pretty much inevitable that your pride is going to take a bit of a hit. But don’t let it consume you. There are a million reasons why two people aren’t compatible. In fact, these days, it’s increasingly rare if they are. It probably has nothing to do with the way you look, your sense of humour, or your levels of success. People get broken up with all the time – supermodels and brain surgeons alike. There are many different reasons for a break-up, many of them circumstantial, so there is no need to blame yourself or wonder where you went wrong.

Stay as busy as you can.
Make up for all that lost time not spent with friends or family or at the gym when your time was occupied with the other person. The best thing to do is make yourself as busy as you possibly can be. The more free time you have, the more your mind will wander to the “what ifs” and the void of the other person’s absence. Be too busy for that.

Get back in the game.
As Samantha Jones once famously said, “the best way of getting over someone is to get under someone else.” While it’s probably not the healthiest thing to jump into bed with someone, you should make it a point to put yourself out there in the dating game as much as possible. No matter what, if your prospects in the dating world are uninspiring at best, your mind will naturally wander to the last person you actually liked.

But don’t become a train wreck.
Sure, “getting back into the game” likely involves booze-filled nights at bars and dates that involve cocktails. But it is impossible to drink away a broken heart. Odds are you are going to make a fool out of yourself if you try. Wild nights usually result in feeling even worse the next day.

Now, get on that – then check back in when you’re feeling better with these six signs you’re over your ex.

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